Other Jobs Feds Can Do for $0

It’s our fourth week working for the Republic in exchange for no money.

In these lean times ($0 income!) a few other jobs I can do for equal pay—but greater pleasure—have crossed my mind.

These include:

10. Post reviews of my travels to TripAdvisor(dot)com
9.    Polish tombstones at my local cemetery
8.    Document the effects of global climate change on my backyard ecosystem
7.    Stand outside Capitol Hill holding clever protest signs for a pet cause [‘prevent guns from killing kids at school,’ for example]
6.    Rehearse an act for America’s Got Talent, or similarly mindless show
5.    Hunt squirrels [ostracized as a monster, I’ll eat hearty and the pelts will keep me warm]
4.    Prepare my tax returns [oh wait, no W-2 from the unpaid feds I work with]
3.    Remove plastic waste from the ocean, or litter from the street
2.    Start a blog, or a literary magazine that publishes short stories

Better yet, when I get really bored and desperate:

1. Perform contract work for the Trump Organization and present them with the bill. I’ll get $0 in return, or dragged to court…

This list isn’t meant to be exhaustive. What other things can unpaid Feds do instead of getting not paid for doing our jobs, while at least feeling fulfilled by the process?

‘Cause we’re not doing it for the money…

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