Swagger Stick

Not long ago, selecting deodorant came with a sense of... not humiliation, exactly. Not quite shame. Mild embarrassment? Here, in the grocery store, under fluorescent lights and warbling muzak, I admitted to an indefatigable human failing: my stinky pits. No more. Thanks to Old Spice, all dressed up for modern times, I need not hide … Continue reading Swagger Stick

Jon Voight’s IOU

Well, gee, is anyone surprised by Jon Voight's absurd words of support addressed to the people of the Republican Party? Is anyone surprised to see the actor who portrayed Milo Minderbinder, Joseph Heller's brilliant rendering of a profiteering con artist in Catch-22, praise the most notorious and corrupt corporate scoundrel America has ever produced? Sure, … Continue reading Jon Voight’s IOU

Mail Call—Trump-Sized Satire

Oh happy day! New books arrived for review, including one unexpected. Thanks to a tip from writing coach, author, and blogger Marylee MacDonald and literary website Dactyl Review I find myself in possession of not one but TWO books courtesy of author U.R. Bowie. The first looks like a novel of the most ridiculous order for … Continue reading Mail Call—Trump-Sized Satire

Lousy Book Covers

This clip from my interview with Matthew Whiteside explores the marketing side of writing books, and why a title like Two Pumps for the Body Man can be a real challenge to promote. The cover didn't help, not even when it was featured on a website called LousyBookCovers(dot)com (their snark goes to 11...). Check the design … Continue reading Lousy Book Covers

Darth Vader’s Henchmen…

Darth Vader's taskmaster Admiral Piett, promoted under choking duress during the Star Wars Trilogy, bears an uncanny resemblance to a peculiar and unlikeable figure serving the current administration. See if you can tell them apart. That's Piett in the Nazi-looking uniform. Miller, rhetoric notwithstanding, dresses a different part. But let's go to the tapes. Here … Continue reading Darth Vader’s Henchmen…

Other Jobs Feds Can Do for $0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJ1VorN9Cl0 It's our fourth week working for the Republic in exchange for no money. In these lean times ($0 income!) a few other jobs I can do for equal pay---but greater pleasure---have crossed my mind. These include: 10. Post reviews of my travels to TripAdvisor(dot)com 9.    Polish tombstones at my local cemetery 8.   … Continue reading Other Jobs Feds Can Do for $0

BAMF vs The Shutdown

This next episode from life at the Bureau of Government Intelligence and Execution---aka BOGIE---introduces the Bureau of Administration, Management, and Facilities. DC may shut its doors on the public workers who serve the Republic. But that can't stop the mofos in BAMF from installing new ones to protect its workers from America's next shooting rampage. Also … Continue reading BAMF vs The Shutdown

Essential Non-Essential

Shutdown 2018 continues unabated, and so do excerpts from life at the  government's Bureau of Government Intelligence and Execution---better known as BOGIE. What happens when DC's 'Fed Buffet' closes its doors---and its payroll---on the public servants who work to prevent  America's next tragedy? Furloughed, you say? Is this what you signed up for? "How do you arrive at … Continue reading Essential Non-Essential

Shutdown Chores

Week one of Government Shutdown 2018 comes to an end, bringing to mind the plot of Patchworks. So why not run a few excerpts from Chapter 12, in which DC's 'Fed Buffet' closes its doors---and its payroll---on a mix of kindly public servants who only wanted to prevent the next great American tragedy. Government intern … Continue reading Shutdown Chores

Redacted!

Today's news has me thinking about redactions. You know, those heavy black lines that prove there are things we do not know or should not know or cannot know, God save the Queen and long live the Republic. And these known unknowns are significant enough that an unseen hand took the trouble of writing them down … Continue reading Redacted!