A List of People Who Also Should Be Armed

Amid all the fury and debate over whether or not to arm high school teachers in order to prevent the next deadly shooting spree, several relevant employment categories are being overlooked. A review of other recent abuses of heavy firepower in public places suggests the United States can only protect itself from itself by requiring itchy … Continue reading A List of People Who Also Should Be Armed

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Eddie Eagle vs Joe Camel

I was perusing NRATV---yes, the NRA broadcasts 24 hours a day!---to choose my favorite 'freedom and firearm-related programming' for the afternoon. Did I want to hear Dan Bongino crack the code and expose 'the real agenda' behind March for Our Lives? Or would I rather get to know why Dana Loesch* thinks, in her simpleton's binary, … Continue reading Eddie Eagle vs Joe Camel

The Little League Coach

The calendar tells us that it's spring. But last Monday, the night before the season's first Little League practice, snow squalls filled the sky. Over the weekend the manager gathered us on a beautiful day for pizza and whiffle ball. Then our second practice got scrubbed for snow, a Nor'easter that eventually dumped half a … Continue reading The Little League Coach

National School Walkout

This requires very little comment on my part other than to say: The school system I fund through my taxes has expressed itself exactly as it should, and exactly as I would have done, if it were my call to make. This letter appears verbatim, bolded lines reflecting my emphasis. Well done, FCPS. FCPS does … Continue reading National School Walkout

March

This month we march. This month, we show our strength by taking to the streets. This month we demand action—not thoughts, not prayers, not false heroes—we demand action to prevent another mass murder by gunfire. You will know the brave ones as we march unarmed. And you will know the cowards by their callous, pandering, … Continue reading March

Gun Talk—COEXIST

This morning I wrote my representatives in Congress*, remembering the words of a strident conservative who came to my book talk looking to bristle with me over guns. ‘Call them by their first name,’ he said. ‘Reminds 'em who they work for.’ He told me at the outset, ‘I’m a shade right of Scalia,’ and noted … Continue reading Gun Talk—COEXIST

We Have Seen and We Have Said

Last month we were treated to countless rounds of being talked down to by law enforcement from Broward County, Florida after yet another completely avoidable massacre at the hands of an American citizen exercising his right to bear an AR-15 semi-automatic assault rifle. 'If you see something, say something,' Broward County Sheriff Scott Israel said … Continue reading We Have Seen and We Have Said

Yes. Today Is the Day to Talk About It.

And tomorrow. And tomorrow. And tomorrow...

Stock Recovery Plan

So what if the stock market is on a rollercoaster this week? Grab some cheap thrills and laugh off your losses with a 15% savings on Patchworks, a hilarious office satire about the ordinary bureaucrats working hard for you in Washington DC. Price too steep? Check it out at the Fairfax County Public Library! Can one … Continue reading Stock Recovery Plan

A Borrower Be

The patient wait is over. Patchworks is now available through the Fairfax County Public Library. Reserve your copy today. Can one intern save us from ourselves, when the government he works for keeps shutting itself down? Patchworks shares a pound of absurdity for every ounce of tragedy, winking in dismay at the circumstances of our … Continue reading A Borrower Be